Threading the Needle

  I have been walking a fine line a lot lately with physical exercise. I constantly feel like I am about to go to far and I could mess up at any time and incur an injury. I feel sometimes in my right shoulder pain and soreness that is close to what injured felt like. I have a feeling in my inner left hip area sometimes feels like it is about to be a major pulled muscle. 

 Since I have not done any Kung Fu for almost 3 years again.I thought when I came back I would jump right in like last time I did it. For context I did quit Kung fu for 3 years then came back and just went hard in training with mostly not much issue.That is not the case this time. 

  I seem to be hyper aware of what is needed from me. I have been doing exercises from physio to improve my muscles again. My mind wants to move and do things like back then, but my body is screaming warning bells at me saying if I go to hard I will hurt you. That would be counter productive for me and making me really analyze my body to start working again.

 I would like to say right now my body is injury free right now and only sore muscles that are an acceptable soreness. They are sore because I am rebuilding myself methodically. I do always feel one misstep and that is it, I’m going to be out physically. Moving slowly and with purpose is the way I am going right now and it is working. 

Acts of kindness: 50

Km: 76

Sit ups: 800

Push ups: 800

Da mu hsing: 20

Drum stick form: 25

Spar: 8

Excuses

So I have had a not to bad week to reintroduce myself to practicing Kung Fu again. Making Kung fu apart of my life again has always made me a better person and Kung Fu continues to do so.

I wanted to blog this week on excuses, because I had a major talk with my family recently about them. There are 2 types, real and fake excuses; about 95% are fake and 5% are real. I always strive to be someone who knows why I fail or succeed in life, because I got to learn on how to follow the path to success and try and avoid the one to failure. The thing about excuses is that it provides a path to mediocrity and a sometimes easier time, but ultimately, it normally makes things worse. Now I do believe in the real excuses because those ones are normally related to events and situations you are unable to control; that’s the 5%. Sometimes though I would take that 5% and make it seem a bigger inconvenience than it really is.

The talk with my parents was an eye opener for me and them. I was starting to feel exhausted with how many excuses they had for why they could not do certain things. It would always spiral into something worse. While we were talking I was being really blunt about why things are harder in their life, but also my own. I’m overweight and not feeling like I am excelling in life, because I let the excuses win. I have experienced depression before and I thought to myself wouldn’t it be nice if I started to think more positively about myself; If only it was so easy. Turns out it sort of is. I am not saying there is not work needed to be done, but what was stopping me from actively trying to better my life. For me it was excuses. I had plenty and I justified all of them. I was just lying to myself and those around me. I was failing because I let it happen.

After the talk with my parents we hugged it out, but being aware in my forms and my life go hand in hand. It’s is a path that is started with small victories. Then I add all those small victories and end with something life changing. I will always have excuses in my life, but I will also have solutions for when most of my excuses that come up. There is always a solution. I just need to look for them. It all boils down to hard work and discipline. If I truly master this then there nothing holding me back.

Speaking of small victories:

Acts of kindness: 15

Km: 50

Sit ups: 400

Push ups: 400

Da Mu Hsing: 6

Drum Stick Form: 10

Spar: 0

A Timid Start

   Hello everyone it has been awhile since I wrote a blog. I literally put writing this blog as late as possible. For me writing this blog is the beginning of a at least 1 year commitment to myself and those around me. This is my 1st blog in a very long time represents a huge step for me. It is the start to my betterment of myself, and that freaks me out. I will be responsible for what I do and what I do not do again. Kung fu for me has always been a pain in my side when I make it so, but it has also been my saving grace to become the best me.

  In the meeting we had I wanted to participate in it and at least say my name, or even show up in person and say what is weird about myself, but my fear won that day. I have been living a hermit lifestyle for quite a few years now and my social game was not great to begin with, but my social phobia has creeped its way back. I have conquered it before and I plan to do it again.

  Right now I fear not the unknown, but the sense of failure. I know the path on how to fail; It is clear as day for me, but I also see the path to success as clear as well. Right now what I need from me is consistency in my actions. When I achieve that I achieve my goals. 

 So my goals are to increase my presence at kung fu, and to lose weight. I want to make kung fu apart of my life again and to not fear it anymore. I have lost weight before and this is my third time doing it. I successfully did both time before. The reason I got big again was because of my car accident. Doing nothing for almost a year put some weight back on me, but that was 5 years ago and I have maintained this overweight state I am in ever since. 

If you made it this far in my blog my weird thing about me is I can drive in my car from spruce grove to Falkland BC a 9 hour drive in complete silence. No music, no nothing just me and the road. 

I see everyone is putting there numbers on their blog. Mine are easy right now to fill out  0 across the board. I will be increasing these numbers by next blog.