Hard work

 I have really been embracing the ideal and action of what  hard work is. Hard work is normally repetitive, monotonous, boring thing to do. Hard work can be fun too sometimes, depending on the situation. Hard work for the most part usually leads to some great accomplishments. 

Hard work for me has become more relevant to me. I want to be fluent in Japanese, then I need to put the time and the effort to achieve that goal. I want to get physically fit, then I need to start going to the gym and practicing my forms. I want to have a positive outlook on life, then I need to practice that positivity. All of these goals involve hard work. 

I do find the answer 'Hard Work' to a lot of my problems vexing, because I am now more aware that there is no trick. There are tools to help all of these goals, but no magic wand to be found. I have mix feeling right now, a bit frustrating, and super motivated. I get to put the 10'000 hours to become the best version of me. After putting in the hard work then I would think now I can rest, but nope I cannot. I will have to remain vigilant to keep putting another 10'000 hour. It may sound tiring, but with proper planning and thought it is doable. 

Hard work is remaining consistent with the action to take to achieve that goal, and approaching the task mindfully. 

Sifu Langner

Sleep

 My sleep has been very erratic since my grandpa's passing. I go to bed around 10 or 9:30 every night, but I am not tired always. I sometimes stay up till 2 or 3 in the morning; not by choice.  I will be in bed getting tired as I read. Then I say alright time to sleep, then immediately feel wide awake again. I always wake up no matter the amount of sleep I got around 7:30 or 8. Usually my normal sleep routine would be I go to bed read then sleep. Now I am up and down then up again. At home I find myself falling asleep in the afternoon now. Not always, but sometimes I get so sleepy and I can't stay up to try and fix my schedule. 

I have not tried anything yet to try and help my sleep yet. I feel as though I am not staying up, or having these erratic sleep behaviors because of the loss of my grandpa. I do feel at peace with how he went. A long happy life in the comfort of his bed. Since that day my sleep has been erratic though. I am hoping I get my sleep under control before I possibly get the go ahead to return to work. 

During the day I feel as if I am on a constant time of drowsiness; even when I am in kung fu or at the gym. I swear I am ok now about the passing. It is sad, but I took a lot of great life lessons from it. I have never been so connected with my family. I am currently having a hard time trying to make sense of this blog. This time I am getting a wave of super sleepy, but I know as soon as I get comfy I will wake up again. 

I do believe I will get a hold of this sleep soon enough. Just one day at a time.

Sifu Langner 

Grandpa

 This is a blog I don't want to do, but also the only thing  that is on my mind. My grandpa passed away last week. It is not like we were not expecting it to happen, but still jarring anyways. He went in his sleep with no pain. He was 92. I just got home and jumped onto my blog. We already had his funeral. 

My grandpa was a man who lived a very full life. He had a big family and always stayed connected with everyone. He was a man who everybody came to when they needed a solution to a problem. He never completed school, but everyone who knew him swore he was a genius. He never waited for anyone to fix his problems, he always attempted it himself. Even if it did not work he would find another solution. There was never in his vocabulary I cant do it. It was always lets try this. He enjoyed a life of the simple things. He had a farm in his backyard and always played cards with friends and family, and lots of fishing.

My grandpa is a man who always charged forwards, always learning and becoming better. He was a super competitive card player. He would for almost any card game we played would be able to tell you what is in your hand after playing just 1 or 2 cards like cribbage.

When I was a kid I remember he was always busy doing something. He was usually in his little farm field taking care of the vegetables, or whittling some wood. He used to take me out driving around the farm lands looking in ditches to collect empty beer bottles. I spent many days with him just driving  around calling "bottle" to go pick it up. After he collected enough he took us out to a restaurant. His biggest haul was 75 dollars. That was normally my summer vacations and I loved them.

I was blessed by my accident. Normally my parents every year always went to go visit my grandparents, but I never went, because I would be very busy with work. Now because of the accident I went with my parents this summer. I was able to have the opportunity to spent time with him one finale time. Not knowing it to be my last time, but grateful for it.

I really do miss him a lot. I guess just like my grandpa I now will try and honor him by charging forwards And to always learn and become better, and  enjoy my family more. 

Sifu Langner 

Just Do It

 I have always found sometimes the easiest yet hardest thing to do is to "just do it". I have learned that sometimes in life I would wait for some miracle to help me achieve my goals. I keep hoping that something will accomplish my goals for me, but it never does. If wanting to do something was so simple of a fix, or wanting to change my mentality just by simply doing it; then why have I not achieved enlightenment. The answer is simple because I have not put in the hard work needed to accomplish such a goal. To achieve anything it all starts with beginning of the journey and to continuously pursue that goal. 

 The reason I believe to "just do it" is so hard to achieve is because of fear of failure, or thinking there is not enough time, or my time has past, or the big one "I'll start tomorrow". Waiting for the perfect moment will never happen. 

  Now to approach this way of thinking, must still be approached with a lot of effort. I must plan appropriately to achieve my goal. If I pursue my goal thoughtlessly it could do me more harm than good. I want to lose weight. I could start my goal by just simply starving myself. It will accomplish the goal, but in the long run will harm me. I am recording my food intake and adjusting a diet that will encourage weight loss, but not starving. I am also going to the gym and invested in a trainer to help me with proper technique so I don't hurt myself and can maintain progress. 

  I have gone through many years in the past of waiting for the miracle to happen, and of course it never did. I have lost weight two other times, so this will be my third time. Both previous times I was successful and I will be successful a third time.

To have the mentality to "just do it" requires a lot of hard work and discipline. Which is why I am so glad that there is a place that teaches such values.... Kung Fu. I am by no means the best at the "just do it" attitude, but it is a way I have been trying to bring into my life.  

I will share this video with you all and I hope it fires you up like it does me.  This video was done with a lot of funny movement, but the message it tells is still very powerful. Even if you have seen this video before I think it deserves a re-watch. 

Shia LaBeouf "Just Do It" Motivational Speech (Original Video by LaBeouf, Rönkkö & Turner) - YouTube

Sifu Langner

Intent and Action

 Intent and action are two completely different concepts, but if they work together you accomplish extraordinary outcomes. Having intent to accomplish a goal, but without action the goal will not be reached. Doing action without intent will make the goal not serve you. Both intent and action used together will make the goal reached and the goal serve you.

 If I want to see a change in myself I need to have intent and action. My intent is to see that change, but it will not happen if I do not take action. If I do actions without intent then achieving my goal will likely fail. Having intent will find value in my actions. 

 Actions and intent can be applied on the grander scale of big life goals, or as small as a single punch. If I apply both intent and action to both it will serve me greatly.

 I have been really finding the great things about how powerful intent and action work together. I find that I have experience all three ways before and have seen the results. I used to put in only action as a younger guy in kung fu. I would show up then leave. That was my action with kung fu, because I had no real intent kung fu served no purpose for me at the time; so I quit. I had intent to go back to kung fu, but never took action. I found my intent, and initiated my action to go back, and then kung fu served me greatly; which helped me achieve extraordinary goals.  

Sifu Langner

 

Murphy's Law

So last week we finally finished some home improvement. My uncle really helped us a lot in finishing our new floors. We really appreciate all the hard work he did for us. We now have laminate flooring and tile bathroom. It was a project my parents wanted done for a very long time. Reason I bring up the construction, because I was helping my uncle throughout the whole process. We were finishing up the bathroom and he was reattaching the water line to the toilet. I was putting some caulking on some base boards. He asked my aunt to pass him an adjustable wrench; it was a fairly big wrench. Well in the passing of the wrench over my head the pass did not make it and dropped on the back of my head. In the very spot that whenever I applied any sort of pressure it would send me into a dizzy spell. 

   This area on the back of my head was more sensitive before and someone just poking the back of my head would make me dizzy. I have come a long way to now it did not effect me at all anymore. Initially after getting hit I was a little worried, but nothing happened right away. Until the adrenalin wore off; I became dizzy and it lasted for two days. Not continuous dizziness, but off and on. 

  I am feeling better now. The tiny event that happened to me seem to not faze me, like other times I have become dizzy. Before I would be really frustrated, or upset at the lack of control I have over my body, and mind. This time I was more mentally ready. It sucks that this random bad thing happened to me, but it is okay. I got to really connect with my aunt and uncle, and that is what stuck in my mind; besides the wrench that hit it. 

Sifu Langner

Nervous

So I am closing in on my re-evaluation from the brain doctor. It will be in January, still 2 months at least. I am not nervous to see if I will be going back to work or not. I am nervous if I do get the green light to go back to work. I wonder if I will find a job, or even still be a somewhat competent electrician. I am still a fairly new journeyman and I worry that even if I find a job I will possibly lose it do to not performing well enough. 

  Coming November 16 will be my anniversary of my accident. That means I have not worked for over a year by the time I get a job again. I have been learning a lot about myself in this year, both mentally and physically. I may be moving towards a better future for myself, but nervousness still wreaks havoc for me when it comes to work. Even before the accident I would always worry that my work could be not good enough, or I am not getting the job done fast enough. I am a man who thinks that I am never doing good enough at my job so I work harder. Even if I am told they are really happy with my work I don't let up, because compliancy produces poor work, or causes harm. I have seen once a worker feels as though they do not have to earn their job, are normally the first ones to go.

  I am developing a new strategy for my way of thinking when going back to work. I need to get the thought process of work hard and not settle for mediocracy, and also show gratitude when I am told I am doing well. I need to maintain my high standards, while not beating myself up. I am just wasting time and energy when I do this. I need to be aware of the negative events that could happen, but not dwell on them. Focus on the possibility of my future and how I will accomplish it. 

  I think this accident has helped me prepare for the return to work, but this time better mentally. Oh boy this is going to be a lot of hard work here, but I am ready for it.

(Side note: Honestly I was feeling a lot more nervous until I wrote this blog and made this plan. The power of The Blog.)

Sifu Langner