Chaos

 This is the most chaotic work schedule I have ever worked. I have worked early in the morning and then late at night and then in the afternoon. It has happened in all a week. I even skipped the two days I was going to get off to go to work. So my sleep has been put through some strain, but I seem to be good still.

 I feel good that I am working again; I really do.  What I am in the process of doing right now is re-establishing balance. I have had over a year vacation where I had all the time in the world to do whatever I want. Sort of, because I had to devote a lot of time to recovery. I eventually established a balance that was working. Now with these manic hours I work, I am truly thrown off. Work has helped me a lot mentally, but unfortunately has thrown of my Kung fu temporarily. 

I have every motivation to get my Kung fu back on my path. It is just a little difficult with the wack-a-doodle schedule at work. They have told me my schedule should be a little more main stream in a week or 2, but once it becomes manageable I might be thrown to work night shift. So many more challenges ahead to come. If they move me to nights I might not be able to go to any classes for a while, but there will still be kung fu.    

Sifu Langner

Sick

 So I am sick. I am currently going through whole days where I feel dizzy. Even as I write this I find it difficult to type. I will say so far Covid negative but that could change by next test. Besides the sickness I still am going to try and work on my 3 star form. I am not sure how yet. Even thinking for awhile about complex ideas is like a squirrel with ADHD. As I am writing I am rethinking about trying to work on my 3 star drum form. I am having a hard time writing this blog properly. 

I think I will work on my breathing meditation. It is hard to breath sometimes, but right now I am good. I might not be able to think to logically right now, but I believe a lot of value in just breathing, besides the obvious reasons.  I am breathing in, I am breathing out. 

I am looking forward to what I might learn once I start this. I have done breathing mediations before just normally not dizzy and sick. Every breath might have a cough, but I will do what I can. Small gentle breathing. I look forward to my first session.

Sifu Langner  

Getting Closer

 I have had some really stressful weeks and I started to go down a bitter path well traveled. I had to be reminded of the silver lining to bad situations. It may be a thin line sometimes, but it is always there. I am also sorry for missing my normal blog day I have been so out of whack these past couple of weeks, that I forgot the best tool to help me through is blogging.

Now to get into the blog I really want to blog about. I am getting so close to completing my 3 star drumming form. All that is left is the closing drum. I was really struggling with what move would make sense before I go into the unicorn stepping. I have finally found the move. It turns out it was a leg sweep. Thanks a lot Sihing Lindstrom for helping me smooth out the transition. I am looking forward to having a completed beta version of my form, so I can drum to my form. I have never gone on such a crazy learning experience making a form. I have made many in the past, but this one is the one I will treasure the longest. 

I have grown better in understanding Drumming, and how my body moves, and making transitions that make sense. There is a reason for why if my original forms could be lacking, it could be my transition. I would say Sai's are my favorite weapon, but this drum form is becoming my favorite fast.

Sihing Langner

Unicorn Stepping

 I have gotten to the unicorn step I will be adding into my 3 star drum form. It is definitely another challenge. I realized that the way I do the unicorn stepping is still to the beat, but it was slower than what I needed for the form. For some reason I could not think of the steps to the beat of the 3 star drum. Sihing Lindstrom helped me reconnected the steps to the 3 star beat. My issue was I was preparing the unicorn step at the clack, and I should of done it at the single thump. Once I had that figured out I started to add techniques to the unicorn stepping. 

The big issue I am having now is because I am doing every beat has a technique it makes the unicorn step a little weird. I am trying to make it the techniques make sense and have purpose. I am trying to not just place the unicorn step in my form just for the sake of  having it. I am trying to make it make sense. I am aiming for intent.   I won't lie the unicorn step in my form seems more like poses, but it is not a bad thing to have poses. I am just not really liking the transitions in between the unicorn stepping. 

It is the defining moments of the clack that seem like to me right now "oh yeah I need to do something" The flow and transition into these clacks make some sense, but I feel as I can do better. 

I am having a hard time with this form, but I am also learning so much about myself and my drumming, and even my unicorn stepping. I am actually having a lot of fun right now.

Sihing Langner  

Friends

  The value of good friends. I remember I used to think when I was younger that someone having tons of friends must have a really great life. They may actually have one, but I found myself during those younger years to have very few to one friend. I found that when I made friends they were of high quality in what they bring to my life. I found friends that  are willing to go the extra mile for me if I asked and I for them. I always got rid of the people in my life that harmed me mentally or physically. Now I am surrounds with a solid group of friends. If I could tell my younger self how amazing things will become I would. Younger me was very isolated. I don't feel alone anymore.

Sifu Langner

Working

 I have been in B.C for a week now just working for Dan and Mel. I have been helping them with some electrical at there house that they are building. I have been really enjoying visiting with them, and I never realized how much having a regular work time all the time actually help me a lot mentally. Having an 8 hour day brings me a peace of mind. Rather than just having a lot of time on my hands to do anything, it is time dedicated to accomplishing a goal. I have been feeling a satisfaction of completing work, and figuring out problems. I never thought I would miss having to work. 

I remember I used to think I cannot wait until I don't have to work anymore, and I got to experience it. It was not my choice though. I had a car accident that let me have the opportunity to not have to work everyday. It was not a fun time off, since most of the time was spent getting ready to go back to work. I did grow greatly as a human because of the accident. I also got to learn to be very grateful for when I find a job. I would not say I was not grateful before, but I would say I am even more grateful now for when I get a job. 

It still boggles my mind that I enjoy working. I believe kung fu helped me come to this conclusion. Kung fu taught me discipline and hard work can amount to wonderous achievements. If I continuously train and progress wisely I will receive results for the hard work. I see the same values in my job. I would go to work continuously and plan accordingly. I put the time and effort to do a good job and eventually I get results for all my hard work. 

Sifu Langner          

5 Star Wall

 In my 3 star form I have been having a really hard time doing a proper technique sequence for when the 5 star comes in. I have been struggling and not liking what ever I was coming up with, and I think I have finally found a movement that I am mostly happy with. This 5 star has really stalled my progress of my form. It has stalled in the sense of adding new moves, and has greatly increase the understanding of the 5 star and the way my body moves. 

I have been really learning so much about drumming and my kung fu. I would find one way to complete the 5 star then I would see the faults of my choices. I had to re imagine the 5 star and really break it down. Learning the The 5 star down to it's core gave me better insights in what were  the possibilities of what I could do for the form.   I am truly having a love hate relationship with my form, and it has been so exciting what I have been learning.

It truly feels like I am on a roller coaster with this form. So much fun.

Sifu Langner