Home

 I need to change my current environment. I live with my parents right now. I did live on my own before, but I had to move back in with my parents. I got into a major car accident a few years ago. I had to go under one year of physical therapy and I had very little income. I would be in financial despair if my parents did not let me move back. They also really helped me during those hard times. They also helped me save up some money to start looking into my first home.

I love and really appreciate what my parents did for me, but living here is in my comfort and mediocrity box. It has a little bit to do with them and all to do with me. I found my mental and physical state became better after I left my home the first time. I know there is nothing to prevent me to achieve better things for me now, they are just convenient excuses. 

It feels like I have a heavy weight of bad habits and laziness that feel like they get encouragement and reinforcement when I live at home. I love them and they love me. So not to much to be upset about. I do have full confidence once I move out into  the struggles of real life with bills and debt; seems to be something I am chasing for. Not just those things, but more importantly for me independence.

The responsibility of taking care of everything about myself drove me. Motivated me to become better. So I am currently looking at houses. I am just waiting for some info from my employer to see what kinda mortgage I can get.

For me living at with my parents is to easy. I thank my parents for giving me the opportunity to have a comfortable life. I yearn for a bit of complications. Hopefully not to big of complications, but life will give and take and hopefully I get to see another great journey ahead.

Sihing Langner

Physical Awareness

I think I need to be more aware of myself. I always find small new cuts or bruises on myself. Then I never know where the damage came from. Makes me feel as though even at work I am still trying to put my best foot forward and do a good job, but my self care for myself takes a bit of a back seat. I do wear proper protective gear. I take the precautions needed when working near or on live electric panels. I just find at the end of most days I have a small injury on my body I have never seen before. 

So when I work I am engaged, now I need to become engaged in myself and take care of it. 

Sihing Langner

A Wolfs story

 An old man told his grandson, 

“My son, there is a battle between two wolves inside us all”

“ One is evil. It is anger, jealousy, greed, resentment, inferiority, lies, and ego. The other is good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, humidity, kindness, empathy, and truth.”

The boy thought about it.

and asked,

“ Grandfather, which wolf wins?”

The old man quietly replied,

                            “ The one you feed”

This is just a small story I found I feel as though this rings fairly true right now for me. I need to feed the wolf I want to be in my life.

Sihing Langner

Tomorrow

 I have another night shift week. So this time I remembered to blog sooner rather then just during my break. 

I find it interesting the concept of tomorrow. It is a promise day that never comes.By saying, I will accomplish something tomorrow A sense of relief can come. A falsified idea that I tell myself “ see I said I was going to do it so now I have to just wait till tomorrow. The same day my magic powers come in”. 

Tomorrow is the very foundation for mediocrity when trying to complete objectives. Why can’t I spend time today towards my  goals. Well let me just pick from my list of excuses. I’m sure one will suffice. A huge part of tomorrow is priorities. To achieve something extraordinary the objective has to be moved up higher on the priority list and become today and every day. I think I’m gonna try some positive reinforcement for myself I will say “ I will eat healthier today, I will practice kung fu today, I will exercise today, I will study my Japanese today”. 

Finally to get rid of tomorrow the follow-through. If I want to lose tomorrow, I start today.

Sihing Langner

Blog no matter what

 So I don’t have a whole lot of time to write my blog this time. I for some reason thought I would just do my blog after work since I had a Sunday shift today, but I forgot it was a night shift I would not of been able to get my blog up until Monday morning. I am currently writing my blog during my break. I don’t know if I’ll be getting another one tonight, so I am seizing my opportunity.

I am trying to get this blogged posted tonight because it means a lot to me to maintain my schedule of Sunday night blog night. I could just wait until I get home a do it Monday, but that would be mediocrity creeping in. My break is almost over so this is my blog for remember to plan better for next time I might work night shift. Also my promise to keep myself consistent in uploading my blogs. 

Sihing Langner

Willpower

 Willpower is like any other muscle. If you do not work it out it will not get any stronger. It is a muscle that can be easily undervalued. To start exercising willpower try the art of simply resisting an impulse of small magnitude. Working on the choice that will re-enforce healthier habits. A simple example would be I will drink more water instead of other liquid substitutes. It seems small at first, but if achieved the willpower of saying no to the other foreign liquids and an embracing of the water, a muscle has been formed. It can be a small step to achieving other goals in life as well. Also if that newly developed muscle is not kept working it will fall again. Consistent action to training willpower is not temporary, it is a forever life goal. It is a road full of ups and downs. 

 Willpower just has to start somewhere, where it starts it up to us. When we are ready for the journey great experiences will await us. Just do not wait to long.

Sihing Langner  

Engagement

The power of engagement can turn your life around for the better. Simply starting to acknowledge small things in life can have a grandiose effect. Consistently Engaging creates tidal waves of change. A small practice can be as simply focus for a minute; I am breathing in I am breathing out. Very small steps. Start to go bigger and bigger where many small engagements turn into great engagement. Recording these engagements help you learn and become even more engaged. The path to engagement is driven by you and those around you. If you do not choose to engage then it will clearly have no value, but once embraced get ready for a wild ride into this thing called life.

Sihing Langner