A New Start

  So I am looking forward to this year and how well it can develop me and help me more physically and mentally. I really enjoyed getting to participate in the banquet. It was already required for me to do so, but for me it has been a few years since I have been able to go. I enjoyed the set up and kitchen service and even the take down. I really enjoyed the opportunity to drum again. I have not really drummed for a few years. It was amazing. All the demos and candidates were a real joy to watch. 

  So now looking at this new start. I am starting a little bumpy with the blog already being late. I was celebrating with my parents for my Mom’s birthday/ Anniversary. It is not a good excuse for why the blog is late, but I should have been on top of this. 

  I will be trying again to achieve weight loss and try to achieving become more comfortable with being social. I can do well in situations where I need to be social, but I usually avoid it like the plague. I will try and create more opportunities for myself to be social because I created the opportunity, not just wait for something magical to happen.

  I am also trying to be in more contact with friends and family. I am so used to never contacting anyone I have become friends with or they’re my direct family. I just stay content on my small bubble and think of only me. I am trying to reconnect you could say with friends and family.

  I am also looking forward to starting my new job, that will be consistent with the hours available. They still might be some over time, but I have never had a schedule where I can see everyday I will be working for the year. The job is still electrical.

  I am grateful for those that are about to embark on this new journey with me and thank you for reading this blog of mine. I do have some number to put, but you will get to see a few things I have added for myself to accomplish.

Acts of kindness: 5

Km: 2

Sit ups: 20

Push ups: 20

Da mu hsing: 0

Drum stick form: 0

Spar: 0

Elliptical(minutes):0

Social outings:0

Family or Friends contacted:0

   

OMG

 Holy moly I can’t believe I missed my day for blogging. I was good for almost the whole year and then literally the last blog for the year I missed the day. I was having the strangest feeling like I forgot something and I could not put my finger on it till just now. 

  This year has had so many up and downs with my kung fu and a lot of it has been tied to my poor decision making, and the stress of working or not working.

  I would not say this year was a failure, but it also not an outstanding success. I have made some better choices in life for sure and still making plenty of mistakes, but I am moving forwards.

   I have a lot of what I have this year thanks to blogging. Even if I was not practicing kung fu physically, I was practicing some aspects of it mentally. 

  What I have failed for me personally was not going to as many classes as I would like to. I know sometimes work happens and ot shows up, but last year I had most of the year off and chose to stay home. I did not do as good as I could have on the physical side of kung fu. I was not able to lose weight. 

   I will say what I have accomplished. Kung fu is back in my life again instead of not at all. I have accomplished more tools to help me stay out of the negative save in my head. I have reached a better place with my drum stick form. I have learned a new time to practice kung fu is after bathroom times. I have wrote all the blogs technically, but I did miss my day. I did not give up on blogging which was my life line.

  What I plan to do moving forward is to take more accountability for what I do and how I move forwards. I have learned a lot about myself this year and what I want. I have a better more thought out plan for a better success for me next year. 

  Right now I am in the I can do this mode. The end of this year is actually just the beginning for me. I am going to strive and keep this momentum going for myself a long as I can and when I fall off I will try and find a way to get back on back quicker. I will fail in the future, but I will be way stronger because of it.

  Just in case I’m not trying to fail, I am trying to succeed. I’m just know who I am and I have been developing more and more tools to get me back to the success side faster. I have periods where I get super motivated, but then something happens and I fall off and never get back again. I am tying to develop way of staying on the better path in my life. It will always be a struggle, but I can always make it a little easier.

  Anyways for my last blog for this year I want to say the biggest of thank you to all of you who have read all or even just some of my blogs. I will always be very grateful for the time you gave me for reading my blogs. I do have some numbers to end the year off. 

Acts of kindness: 2200

Km: 1820

Sit ups: 8100

Push ups: 8100

Da mu hsing: 170

Drum stick form: 285

Spar: 108

Blogs:50

Change

 I have had Multiple times gone through change. Good and bad. Change is something in life that is a guaranteed. I have reacted multiple times in my life very negatively towards change. The best examples I have is Kung fu.

 When I joined Kung fu it was all for the wrong reasons and I stayed in it for the wrong ones as well. I started with a different school than Master Brinker’s. I started with another teacher that had connections to Master Brinker. My first instructor eventually sent me to Master Brinker’s school as a permanent. I was now in a new environment.

 I was an orange belt with 4 green stripes which meant at the time in the different school that I was almost ready for green belt. I just came to the new school and right away they cut off my green stripes and I had to start orange belt over.

  As a kid I was furious and resentful for them throwing away my “hard work”, but in reality they were making me apart of their school and had to re evaluate me to learn silent river kung fu way and go from there. 

 I was ignorant and kept that new attitude for the rest of my stay until 2nd degree brown belt. I took everything they did to me as an attack an unfair and making me try and jump through hoops to get what I want.

 They made Lao Gar (sorry if misspelled) now a new requirement to get your black belt. Before the only taught that form in a special class you could sign up for, but I did not and became even more resistant to them now forcing me to learn a new form I don’t know to get my black belt.

  I took the change as another negative and hoop, when it was designed to help me become a better martial artist. I took everything they through at me as “how dare they hold me back for my promotion to blue or green belt. How dare they. I know I am better and ready”I was not 

  All the instructors had nothing but my best interest for me and were offering me more tools to become better, not hoops. I eventually quit kung fu for 3 years. I thought of it as a scam and thought my life was better. It was mediocre.

  My mom was also a part of kung fu and I thought every year she failed the black belt test proved me right. I thought she would never get it because they rigged the system. Then one year she finally got it. She failed multiple times, but never gave up. She was sad, Sure when she failed, but it made her try even harder. It always made her reevaluate and try again.

  I finally saw what silent river kung fu was doing they made my mom not only a black belt, but a better person too. It’s not like she was horrible before, but she had better skills at coping with failure and taught me how to get back up.

 I came back to kung fu a changed person and saw now all the changes they made and continue doing so has always been them offering more tools at my disposal to become a better martial artist and a better human being. It was my choice to use the tools they offered and my choice to not use them. 

 I found using the tools offered helped me greatly and my goals changed in life and kung fu. I learned to evaluate change more often as an opportunity to improve or learn why the change was made. Most of the time change at kung fu is made to make all of us better martial artist or people in the long run. Kung fu has lots of repetition, but is also a living organism that grows and adapts with us as time goes on.

  Change can suck sometimes, but its not the end of the world. Maybe some change in the world or work, might be the wrong direction, but sometimes you got to ride the process out and see what the results might be, could be positive and so much better.

  In life change can be chaotic, but sometimes change is good and for all my experiences at kung fu I have yet to have a truly negative change at kung fu. If anything was negative it was because I had the wrong attitude and was closed off to new beginnings. Changes at the kung fu have always been better for the long run of things.

  Kung fu will change again and more tools will be given or altered to help us all. Change can be scary, but in reality it’s one of the few absolutes we have in life. 

 Anyways a really long blog today. Thank you for reading it. I do have numbers today.

Acts of kindness: 2150

Km: 1800

Sit ups: 8000

Push ups: 8000

Da mu hsing: 165

Drum stick form: 280

Spar: 108

Inevitable

 So I have been struggling with practicing kung fu, but it has gotten better. Simply put whenever I go to the bathroom I do a little bit of kung fu. 

  Now I will say it’s not like I’m doing full forms in the bathroom, but after I go I practice some forms or do some push ups or sit ups. The bathroom is simply an alarm for me to remind me of practice. 

No matter what, everyday I will be going to the bathroom; it’s inevitable. So I took the advice given to me and made the bathroom time also a little bit of kung fu time. Making my practice some kung fu inevitable.

 Now the bathroom trick mainly only works at home, but doing more kung fu again is always a good path for me. 

A short blog today, but I like this one. Thank you for reading my blog and I have numbers.

Acts of kindness: 2100

Km: 1700

Sit ups: 7800

Push ups: 7800

Da mu hsing: 163

Drum stick form: 275

Spar: 108

Imbalance

 My engagement must be low since I have a hard time of thinking of what to blog. When I am unsure of what to blog it can be a sign of lack of engagement in life for me. I have been working in the extremes. If I don’t work I do nothing. If I work I work hard. No middle ground.

  I found this Sunday to be one of my laziest. I pretty much almost slept all day and I’m still a little tired. Sunday has always been a rest day to refocus, but to sleep almost all day is a bit much. I have been working non stop for awhile now, but 2 days off is good.

 Down side of this sleep all day is now my sleep schedule for a little bit is going to be thrown off. That’s the consequence of my actions though or rather inaction. 

 I need to establish a better routine in my life where it’s more sustainable and more positive for me. Working is good to make money, but not living life at all is bad. I always thinks it’s funny to me that when I work or not in both scenarios I did not really live life. When I had time I stayed at home, and now that I don’t have time I have a better excuse for not living life.

  I don’t like being proficient in mediocrity. It is the skill I have a Doctorate in. I am good at calling myself out( mainly just the negative things , not the positive side), but then it’s the next step that I have issues with. It’s the apply a solution step. It acquires me to stop being mediocre. 

 Step one in always in getting better is acknowledging your faults so you can learn and grow from them. If I were to say I don’t know why I am so mediocre then that’s a lie to myself. I can’t start fixing my problems if I can’t even acknowledge what I am doing to sabotage myself. 

Acknowledging the problem is easy for me, but it’s literally just the beginning of a great change. It’s the action step that take a lot of willpower and determination and motivation to accomplish.

  I’m always up and down mentally. I have more time in the down side of things mentally, but I know what the good side is like. Blogging has been my core anchor for me this year. It has helped me not stay in the darkest side of my mind. Blogging has helped me not stay there.

 I don’t have any new numbers. I thank you for reading this blog of mine

Stay Awake

I am having a hard time writing this blog tonight. I am literally trying to fight off me sleeping. I think it’s interesting that I went from an unlimited schedule to be doing anything, to be non stop working.  I have been working non stop with crazy hours. 

It’s kinda funny how when I had al the time in the world I did not do much kung fu, but now that I am super busy with work, I am trying harder to keep kung fu in my life 

 I almost dozed off to bed and realized I had not written a blog. These Blogs are important to me. They have kept me afloat for the whole year. I feel as if I had missed a blog I would have already fallen off the wagon completely.

  My kung fu journey is a never ending one. I’m at least happy to say kung fu is a part of my life, even if it’s only a little right now. 

 Thank you for reading short blog today. I do have some numbers this time:

Acts of kindness: 2050

Km: 1650

Sit ups: 7600

Push ups: 7600

Da mu hsing: 160

Drum stick form: 270

The Power of Poke

   I have been poked a few times. It can really work for some or a complete miss for others, but I find I fall into the category of it works. I sometimes get a poke about how am I doing mentally or if I’m going to kung fu. It is a simple gesture that carries no ill will and simply tosses the ball into my court.

  I have had days where I was simply exhausted from work and getting ready for bed, then a little poke happens and says Kung fu maybe? Maybe not exactly like that, but it is the jist. I know whatever answer I put it would not be looked down upon. 

 It is a simple poke that just wants the best for me. If I am working sure, if I am about to make a lazy decision maybe not anymore. 

  Being able to do a good poke has a bit of finesse to it as well. The best ones are normally simple for me, but it changes for everyone to what they respond to. 

 The other poke for my mental was simply asking what anime or manga I’m into or if I’m practicing . Not asking if I’m mentally stable, because I was quite wobbly, but simply starting a conversation. Eventually Maybe making a new friend. 

  The poke did not feel like any pressure and simply made me feel responsible for my actions and wanting more for myself. It all helped a lot.

 The art of being a good poker is like walking on a tight rope it’s a very effective tool, but poke to hard and it completely collapses. This again depends on the person. Everyone is different. I have just be lucky enough to have good pokers in my life. 

  I want to thank the people who have poked me to maybe make better decisions on my life and still every now then send me a poke. It’s the smallest gesture with grand impact.

Also thank you everyone for reading this blog. The skill for doing so is always admired by me. Anyways I have some new numbers to put:

Acts of kindness: 2010

Km: 1620

Sit ups: 7570

Push ups: 7570

Da mu hsing: 160

Drum stick form: 269

Spar: 108