Timing

 I need to pick better times to write my blogs. Leaving it to the end of day is not a responsible decision I did. I was getting ready to write my blog last night and I fell asleep thinking of what to write. It was late and I woke up today feeling bad I missed my day for blogging. I could not write anything until now on my lunch break. So I am sorry for not keeping my promise for writing at least once a week.

 Blogging will always be the greatest tool at my disposal. It helps me grow as a person. Blogging might not always be my favorite activity, but it will always be the most important to me. It is a time for me to think about me and what am I doing right now. Am I practicing kung fu? am I engaged in life? How am I doing in general?These are the questions I ask myself when I am getting ready to blog. Sometime I will have some plan of what type of blog I will write, but things change. 

I had no real plans yesterday for a blog idea, but I was determined to write before I sleep; Clearly sleep won . I woke up with a white screen staring back at me. 

  I will say as far as my mental and physical state goes I am in a really good place write now for kung fu. I am getting better numbers and making better progress. Normally kung fu starts to die off, but so far it is staying alive.

Unfortunately I am running out of time to blog, because my lunch break is almost over, but I had to write my blog today as soon I was able to. Another minute without writing my blog continues to build my guilt for not keeping my promise. So to get rid of some of my guilt I am writing one now. I still feel bad that I missed the deadline, but me just waiting until next Sunday is not an option.

Well I thank you all for reading this blog today. It is definitely not my best blog, but a wake up call for me to get my schedule under control for blogging. Anyways here are some numbers

Acts of kindness: 750

Km: 800

Sit ups: 5900

Push ups: 5900

Da mu hsing: 108

Drum stick form: 135

Source of Energy

     I have found when I go through lulls of inactivity in kung fu I become unmotivated in life. I could say simply being inactive causes that as well, but during my work schedule I was going to a gym and I was feeling slightly better, but still empty. When I practice kung fu it fills me with energy and motivation. Doing the forms brings me joy and participation in classes when I can brings me motivation for something better. 

  Going to a gym and simply working out is good for my health, but I’m usually super bored and just looking forward to when it ends. I do give it my all and try to do good in the gym, but it’s repetitiveness that does have value, but it is boring. I am not a huge music listener so it does not help me for gym work. I usually listen to something I like on YouTube. I find value in exercising often I just wish it was more fun to put it simply.

    When I participate in kung fu my eyes and mind are wide open and burning to learn as much as I can. I don’t remember ever having a class that was boring. I am always astonished for how long I have been doing kung fu and I am still learning new things about forms I have done many times. 

  Kung fu gives me renewed energy when I prioritize it in my life. I do have a bad habit of putting kung fu on the back burner, but that’s due to sheer laziness. I don’t need music or YouTube in the background to practice kung fu I just need kung fu. I need to sort out my priorities and put kung fu higher on my list again.

    Hard work and discipline would be so much better if it was fun to do. Kung fu gives me the experience of having that fun when I do it. I get to understand what gym goers always tell me that someday I will feel off if I miss a gym day. I have never once felt that in a gym. It could be maybe I have not gone long enough to be fair. The longest stint I ever did at a gym was 3 months continuous and I never got that feeling of wanting to go to the gym. 

  I only realized recently that kung fu gives me that feeling. When I am in it and going to all the classes I feel amazing, but if I miss some I feel as I missed out on something amazing. Which is most likely true. Kung fu for me is a source of truly extraordinary miracles. It’s like the saying “if you build it they will come” but for Kung fu” if you practice it you will grow”. Kung fu is an endless fountain of growing opportunities. 

     My kung fu has being a little better this past week. I’m still not doing zero, but my numbers are getting slightly better. I can do better and I will. I have to be happy that I’m not doing zero. That this has to be good news for me. I have to believe it to be a positive. I am simply trying to convince myself that I did good and it ok. I will do better but I’m trying to acknowledge the effort. I have a lot of negative things I want to say, but I’m not going to write it. I am trying to reinforce positivity. I know I can do better. Just a little bit at a time. 

    I may never be the most fit person ever, or the person who is the most talented, but I will be the person who always keeps trying. Doing 1 is better than 0 doing more than 1 is better. Doing something is always better.

   Thank you everyone again for reading my blog. It’s kinda funny I go into the blog with intentions of doing a shorter one, but it always ends up becoming a long one. Anyways here are some numbers: 

Acts of kindness: 650

Km: 700

Sit ups: 5500

Push ups: 5500

Da mu hsing: 93

Drum stick form: 125

Spar: 108

Late, Tired, Sleepy.

  All I want to do right now is sleep. It was a long day and as I lay my head to rest, I remembered it was Sunday; blogging time. 

 I have put in my life right now as blogging is a high priority for me. It is my life line to me and kung fu. If I miss a week, even if it was a reasonable excuse, I will fall off. Every time I started skipping or not writing my blogs is when my life and kung fu get worse.

 Blogging is the very tool that has changed my life. I don’t personally like writing these blogs all the time, but it keeps me engaged in life and more focused on kung fu. Blogging forces me to see my flaws and see my successes. I see the great value blogging has to offer me and I try to use it. 

  If I lived in my comfort zone I would not blog. It can be tedious, and sometimes keeping me awake before I go to bed. I still go to blogs because they are a source of extraordinary events and miracles. If I use the blog it will help me build a better person. 

  Even knowing I said some negative things about blogging. I would recommend anyone to start blogging if they are going through something. It might not fix, or will, but one thing for sure it will help. Not an instant fix, but a start.

 Blogging might be the greatest tool I was ever given. 

   My mind is a fuzzy right now and I’m not sure if I was coherent in my blog, but I hope you all had a great day and of course thank you for reading my fuzzy blog.

Anyways here are some numbers:

Acts of kindness: 600

Km: 600

Sit ups: 5150

Push ups: 5150

Da mu hsing: 85

Drum stick form: 119

Spar: 108

Also Introvert

 I remember when I first learn what this word means. I always thought my parents were very out going people, but then later realized we were family of introverts. I thought they were extroverts, because they could talk for a very long time, but later realized that was to people they were comfortable with. I turned out the same way. Once I am comfortable with you I talk up a storm.

  I would say I have always preferred not interacting with anyone. If I could live life without ever having to be responsible to the outside world I might take it, but I’m not a 100 % introvert.

   I want to make my friend group size bigger without talking. I want to maybe meet someone, someday with out interacting with the world. I want more introverted friends, but normally we all keep to ourselves. 

 I find sometimes being an introvert has some advantages. I don’t mind going to Japan for month by myself. I enjoy staying home and watching random YouTube or reading. I enjoy most of the time being self reliant and living in my small little world; It is cozy. For the most of my time I am content with myself.

  Extroverts are sometimes scary people to me. They want to go out all the time and hang out just for the sake of hanging out. Not hang out at home, but go somewhere and meet up. Extroverts have this weird ability to strike up a conversation with random people and become invested and even look forward to maybe meeting these people again.

 I have been trying to learn to have more extrovert like tendencies in my life. Not that I don’t value who I am. I personally don’t think anyone is a pure extrovert or introvert ; we all lean a little to one side or the other. I also think it’s not good to be purely one or the other. 

 I am just trying to be me, but also put myself out there like others. I have tried to learn the good and bad of both traits the best I can. I am trying to not go months without any human interaction and being perfectly content with that. 

  I am trying to find my balance of where I can freely want to hang out with people and then also be content with zero interaction at home. 

  Kung fu was minimal, but not zero. I have been busy, but not efficient with my time. I would say this is a huge success for me, because normally it’s zero, but I will always strive for better, because I know I can do better. 

Anyways thanks again for reading my blog. It is always amazing that you do this. Here are my numbers.

Acts of kindness: 550

Km: 500

Sit ups: 5000

Push ups: 5000

Da mu hsing: 80

Drum stick form: 112

Spar: 108

Weird Cold + Do Better + Tiger Challenge

 Since near the end of my work week I swear my hotel I was staying at made me have a weird cold. My nose is producing excessive mucus and at the same time hardening inside my nose. I have been actively taking medicine and resting for pretty much my whole week off from work. 

 Cold in the past for me are normally just small inconvenience I might be down in the dumps for a short while, but eventually I get better. It seems to be a long one this time.  I want to say I am on the tail end now of this cold. My nose feels clear sort of and the hardening has also gone down.

 As far as kung fu goes I saw the small challenge offered to me and was able to do some kung fu. It was better than what I normally do which is zero kung fu. You could say I am doing the bare minimum to be in engaged in kung fu. 

 I do tend to take the more negative stance on when I am doing something positive in my life. Instead of me being happy that I’m doing some kung fu than none. I just see myself as a lazy person who could have done more. I’m praising myself for kinda trying. When I should say I can do better.

  In reality I need both. I need to be proud of when I am at least making an attempt, but also have the drive to want to do more. Doing something is better than nothing at all, but I should not settle if I am capable of doing more. 

I had mixed feelings about missing tiger challenge. One side of me was happy and ecstatic about not having to participate. I had a legitimate reason for not going, because I was working. The tiger challenge was giving me a lot of anxiety. The other side of me though was disappointed that I thought like this and missing an opportunity to be responsible for myself and getting an opportunity to be social. 

 The tiger challenge offers nothing but good experiences and lots of self growth opportunities. It is a really good event and I was happy to miss it. My way of thinking is wrong. I should feel sad or upset that I did not get the chance to go the tiger challenge, but I don’t. I’m upset that I think this way at all. Why should I be happy about missing an opportunity that would make me a better person. 

 I seem to be striving for mediocracy. Mediocracy is easy and comfy while becoming extraordinary is difficult and a path filled with challenges to make me a better me. I should rush at opportunities given to me when I get them and act appropriately when I miss out on some. It is not the end of the world if I miss some opportunities, but the attitude I take should be appropriate as well. 

I missed tiger challenge, but I could have still practiced my forms and did what I could anyways. There is always a solution to most of my issues I just need to start taking the answers and start applying them. 

  I just want to say this to everyone who participated in the tiger challenge congratulations on making a good choice and be proud of the achievement of going to the tiger challenge. It will always be an extraordinary experience that you will always have in your life. I hope I will do the same if I get the opportunity next time. I hope if I can’t make it due to work, I will be down hearted, but still wish I could have been there. 

 I am truly trying to become a better person even if my actions or blogs could be saying otherwise. I will tell you all now if I miss a blog I will be officially running away from kung fu. It is a pattern of mine that I have done before. It is easier to hide my faults and disconnection by not blogging. Because I will be trying to disappear from your memories. So no one can reach me. That what me not blogging will mean. 

So I will try and continue to blog and continue to make the effort of keeping kung fu in my life. Even if it is a bit wobbly sometimes.

  Well today blog was certainly all over the place. I had to update my title three times. I just want to thank you once again for reading this blog. The extraordinary thing of reading another persons blog is always so impressive to me. Anyways here are some numbers.

Acts of kindness: 500

Km: 400

Sit ups: 4850

Push ups: 4850

Da mu hsing: 77

Drum stick form: 108

Spar: 108